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Bang 76: It's a revolution

08/04/10 || InquisitorGeneralis

Just when you think you’ve seen it all… there’s Bang 76. Here on Teh Domination we have covered pirate metal, viking metal, Lovecraft metal, marijuana metal, and even fucken vegetarian metal. But never, ever in my life have I come across any metal genre as patriotically awesome and absurd as Bang 76’s Revolutionary War Metal. I promise you this band is 100% real and their existence alone makes me question every established belief I have regarding life, death, religion, morality, the afterlife, philosophy, and man’s place in the universe. George Washington is most certainly rolling over… and shitting himself in his grave. Check out the link below to see these guys in action!

Shine by Bang 76

Now you’ve seen it all huh? The best moment is when the General’s hat flies off!

According to “It’s a Revolution’s” liner notes Bang 76 are…

…a platoon of four dead soldiers back form the Revolutionary War to start a rock revolution. They have drafted a Rock Constitution which includes the “Bill of the Right to Rock”.

Laughing? Crying? Loading up a flintlock pistol with suicidal intent? Whoah baby this shit is pure gold. In honor of these founding fathers of funk I will complete this review with my own constitution…of pain!

Preamble
I, Inquisitorgeneralis, the most inept proofreader and bromantic fucktard on the staff of Global Domination, swear to review Bang 76’s ridiculously themed album “It’s a Revolution” with as much sarcasm and bad puns and metaphors as humanly possible. Trust me, it deserves it.

Article I: The Schtick

Bang 76 not only sing about the Revolutionary War, they go full bore musket with alter egos and dress up as late 18th century zombies…awesome. General G.W. takes vocal command while Col. Dan Hardrock and Sgt. Roy Revere handles the guitars and bass respectively. My personal favorite whackjob in this outfit is the “traitor/redcoat” Charles the Redcoat who handles the drums. Complete with full costumes, hats, whigs, and even corpsepaint (remember, they are back from the dead) Bang 76 cross the Delaware river of cheesiness and win a Princeton-sized victory for the forces of theatrical rock and roll. Unfortunately, the overwhelming power of reality may be a tougher opponent.

Article II: The Tunes

Bang 76 sound a lot like a garage band trying to cover The Cult. Honestly, the music is not awful but certainly nothing spectacular. The General has some decent vocal moments and the old-school vibe is clear and I appreciate that but Bang 76 is not winning any Grammy’s anytime soon. Hell, even the real George Washington lost more battles than he won. I guess this give these four fuckos some hope for the future. The whole get-up is cute, but real songs are going to be needed if these guys ever hope to be taken seriously and not be seen as an attraction from Colonial Williamsburg.

Article III: The End and Score

Overall, “It’s a Revolution” is cute and the motif is ok but Bang 76 are check and balanced by a lack of memorable songs. If it is a joke that’s one thing but if they ever want to be taken seriously these need to stop sounding like everyone else and make an identity for themselves that goes beyond the outfits. Just like the Articles of Confederation failed the first time around, Bang 76 might need to give making a “rock constitution” another shot.

For being somewhat original and mildly entertaining Bang 76 get the following score. Still, this really does sound like The Cult singing in history class.

Information
Released: 2008
Label: None
Website: www.bang76.com
Band
Gen G.W: vocals
Col. Don Hardrock: guitars
Sgt. Roy Revere: bass
The Redcoat: drums

Tracklist
01. Burden
02. Digits
03. Wound
04. Losin’ It
05. Pieces
06. Tie Me down
07. One of Us
08. Rise With Me
09. Mission of Mercy

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